When the past dream no longer fits…

Last Thursday life came into a new focus. In fact, it was such a profound perspective shift, it felt like waking up in someone else’s life. It seemed every decision, every fork in the road over the past three years was in front of me.

And suddenly, that potential I referred to in the last blog was clear.

I love skiing, trail running, and living in sunny Bend… but not as much as I love the field of Marriage and Family Therapy. It hit me like a freight train. All in one moment:

Not only do I love my career, I get to share it with the love of my life who also loves it.

That is my one thing, being a therapist with my hubby. That is what my life is about. And hiding from my potential has taken the form of attempting to arrange my life around other things I love.

Bend is an incredible place if you are an amateur or professional athlete and your life is about your sport. It is also an incredible place if you work remotely so you get paid a big city paycheck and live in a small town. It is also an incredible place if you don’t really like your job and want to drink beer or play outside with all your free time.

I have come to realize I was in the latter category when we first decided to move here. The Army and working throughout my education left Michael and I totally burnt out. We literally just wanted to work enough to pay the bills, run outside, and ski.

However, Bend has become like an incubator for us. We have developed ideas, methods, and have more to offer than ever. And our dream has expanded past just working to pay the bills. We have a clear vision and goals to match.

Change is on the horizon…..

The Ocean

I’d like to think it’s a simple product of wanting what I can’t have. Perhaps it’s a desire built from a summer of smoke and wildfire destruction. Or maybe it’s the way the cold high desert can make one feel out to sea; isolated from large populations and cut off from society.

I find myself dreaming of the ocean. In tune with the rock of swells, powered by the wind and fueled by the sun. Waiting for sunrises and letting go of sunsets. The rhythm of nature and the unique schedule of sailing. A new territory that is different every day. A tiny capsule with everything I need accessing much of the earth. This makes up the contents of my dreams these days.